Sunday, July 19, 2009

Secret #5 - Sista Sheriff

This is not a pleasant secret to reveal. It is another part of my personality, like Grudgy Greta, that I am well aware of but not terribly fond of.
Sheriff's Badge
I am that annoying person at game parties that knows the rules. I not only know them, but I am often aware that I become the rule enforcer once the game is started. Yup. I am that chick. Unbending, pulling out the book when a rule infraction has been committed, and the one that makes "house rules" very difficult to incorporate.

I am also very comfortable in my life when I know that there are rules to follow. I become very panicky when life throws you that loop that says, "Go with the flow." I don't "flow" well. I flop. Like a fish. Out of water. Gasping. I neeeeed rules. I need to know that there is an order to follow and a way to do it "right." I drive my friends nuts with this. Hubby has been a victim of it too. They roll their eyes and gently take me by the hand....

I find rules comforting. Don't wear white after Labor Day. Forks on the left, knives and spoons on the right. Don't chew with your mouth open. Write your thank you notes within two weeks. Don't attend a get together without at least bringing a bottle of wine. I like knowing what is expected of me. Soothes my insecurities a little. Mostly.

About the only place I struggle with the rules, is driving. Recently, after a blazing trip across Kansas getting home, I traveled at least 10 mph over the speed limit. Never saw one cop. Not one. Nada. Got home safe and sound and right on time, considering I had to stop for potty breaks and snack time. The next day, traveling into town for my ill-timed hair appointment, I was stopped on a local road and received a citation for traveling 5 mph over the speed limit.... AAAARGH! I have a long history of speeding tickets, and Hubby was not impressed when I called to confess my digression. I once had my very own insurance policy because I was such a naughty driver... I must be more careful!

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