Saturday, May 2, 2009

Things I love about my zoo...

Good Morning all! I am feeling a bit dreamy and mushy again this morning... Can't say it's the Eggplant this early, although things like that seem to make me reflect more. I wanted to share some simple things that make my life what it is and make me appreciate it each day - Even when appreciating it is vastly difficult!
1. I love the fact that my life is not easy... Those of you who know me, this may shock you! I complain about my difficulties loudly! Sometimes I am even bitter that they seem to come unbidden and frequently into my sphere of being. Hmmmm.... But really, I wouldn't have it any other way! The difficulties in my life make perspective so much easier! When I am just so unsure and low, God gives me a blessing that makes life just so incredibly clear! It is only through the lifting of darkness that the light takes on a welcome tint and sunshine viewed after a period of gloom is so much brighter and clearer than before... I treasure those moments!

2. I am energized by the smell of my world. Ok - So in the written word, that sounds profoundly weird! I mean that I am often connecting moments in my life that bring great comfort with certain smells. In my childhood I was always in my happiest place opening my Grandpa's metal lunch box seeking out the treats he left me once he returned home. There was always an aroma of a freshly peeled orange. Grandpa always saved me something, but those orange peels scented the box and gave me a feeling of comfort in a childhood that I was often confused by. Now, the scents I find most comforting are harder to describe. The scent of the nape of my son's neck as I kiss him goodnight... No longer that baby smell, but still my own kid with all his wild dreams and imaginings. The scent of hay in my daughter's room, telltale signs of two bunnies she loves and cuddles. The musky smell of horses on my husband's coats that hang in the front hall. The comforting smell of a dog at my feet... All of them have communicated to me that I am home. Not just in the house we live in - that has changed through the years - but truly home!

3. I am grateful for the freedom I enjoy in my work. I am so incredibly grateful that I don't have to work at just one thing! I have learned that that is a burden to me... I cannot possibly seem to connect with the duties I am often faced with in running my husband's business with the horses. I love what I do, mostly... The website, the parties, the people... But let's face it straight on, shall we? I am a miserable failure at accounting and filing and returning phone calls... I flog through those things confused and drained! It is at those times that if I am paying any attention I will sneak into my card room and CREATE! In this day and age of electronic communication and the fading of the written word, I make cards! Seems like a venture doomed to failure, but I have made a small go of it! Nothing ground-breaking, but it feeds me! I come out of that room re-energized, if a little groggy and dreamy. And then there is the busyness of the feed business. The interaction with someone else in the office has gotten me back into the swing of actually being there! I didn't realize that I had not been there because I was often alone in there... I am so blessed by my partner's presence, both in my office and in my life!

I am convinced that the toads God presents me with in life are just moments to reflect on how much work he has put into that particular event or person. It make look like just a toad (I found this one while looking for the rental car keys in OKC), but it may be a prince waiting to be accepted into my world and loved for what it is instead of what it isn't.
(Please forgive the incredibly bad photos...)

2 comments:

  1. I really do miss ya. I miss the conversations and the advice. Sure wish we lived closer now so that you could share you advice on raising kids. Thanks for posting this blog.

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  2. I miss you too! We can always get together on Skype... Do you have that yet? It is a free program that allows you to chat online. If you have the ability to talk it is also free and they have webcam support... Which I do not! :P Just go to Skype.com and download the program if you want. Then we can chat together!

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