What if it all goes right?

It's a song, you know...  "What if it all goes right?  What if it all works out...."  (if you'd like to read the lyrics to the song, click here.)  It's a song about changing our attitudes.  Instead of approaching something that seems scary, frightening, or unsettling with an attitude of "What could go wrong?" This song encourages the listener to think in very different terms.  Think about what could happen if it actually works out the way it is supposed to - or better!  What if it turns out better!

It's a song I sing loudly and very much out of tune as I drive in the car. (I also car dance and bang on the steering wheel as well...  It is who I am people!  Get used to it!)

I am faced with a project that I am supposed to do.  I don't feel capable.  I don't feel worthy.  I feel freaked out and insecure and very much out of my element!  But today, I listened to my phone in the car (yes, it holds all of my music and I am still very much in love with it!) and that particular song came across the speakers.  It reminded me that I am not the one that I need to worry about in this task.  I need to simply do as I have been asked and the rest will take care of itself. 

And besides, what if it all goes right?

What if, in doing this task, I am actually blessed beyond measure?  What if it is the actual thing I have been searching for all my life?  What if...  well, what if it all goes right?  Wouldn't that just be so very, very cool?

Simple Things - A day late!

Hello, sweet Christina!  I am a day late this time, but I did have things I wanted to remember, if even just for me....

• my life is simpler because I don't do Facebook... Ahhhhhh.
• wandering around my early morning home in the dark, and not tripping over things
• a cleaned up laundry room
• having a deposit to take to the bank, even if it just keeps the wolves at bay
• my daughter's smile as she leaves the car for the school bus
• enough money in the bank account to "pick up a few things"
• playing ZooTycoon because I got the billing done and it's my treat
• new pictures of my neice - Absolute Bliss!
• the warmth of my dog on my lap
• propane in the tank and hot water in my bath
• comfort food like meatloaf - ok turkey-loaf, but still!
• knowing in my soul that it will get better
• new friends
• being understood
• my husband's smile
• watching my son giggle while I "dance" in the car
• knowing I will be loved all my life

Thanks Christina...  Sorry for being tardy!  Yesterday was anything but simple! :-)

Hot, hot, hot!

Um, yeah... I am married to a hottie!  Wanna See?

All due credit to the Quarter Horse News and Bert Entwhistle for their stunning photo.  (Even if the information on the tag is incorrect for Sheryl - She's from Grand Junction, not Elbert.)

If you look closely you can see that my sweet man is hauling *ss! All four hooves are up off the ground and those boot toes turned out means he's applying lots of leg pressure, a.k.a. putting the pedal to the metal!

I told you he ROCKS!

Those Ah-Ha Moments...

We are studying about Martha and Mary in our home-Bible Study group.  Two very different personalities and two that most women would pick one or the other to say they are most like.  Martha is the doer, the woman with alot to do and she just flat puts her head down and gets it done.  Mary is the dreamer, the quiet soul who contemplates before she does anything, making sure her decisions are the right ones and never seems to get ruffled in much of any way. 

The woman that wrote the study is very adept at getting right to the point and there have been points in the study that felt like just that - sharp, barbed points.  There have been moments during this venture that I have winced at how clearly God points to my shortfalls and my bad attitudes.  I think all of us have had those moments.  It hasn't been so bad as to make us quit.  We are a resilient bunch, and we truly do want to get better.  Better at making our Martha-Get-It-Done attitudes mesh with our Mary-Quiet-Soul-Listen-to-God-Better hearts.

Today was an Ah-Ha moment for me...  I believe there are times that you ask God for clarity, and He waits until you are truly ready to hear the answer.  Waits for what seems like a looooong time.  Long enough that you have gone on your way, sure He either didn't hear, or the question wasn't worthy of a response...  And then one day, seemingly out of the blue, you get it.  You get it in a way that can be nothing other than Divine Intervention.  A voice through your usual fog of busyness that cannot be mistaken for all the other voices you hear on a regular basis.  Clarity on where you are falling down.  Like a light shone on a crack in the sidewalk you walk every day and only now you see why you trip there...  The crevasse is one that you are shocked you haven't seen before, but that is how He works.  He shows us only when we are ready to fix it.  I am standing there now, looking at that gaping maw and shaking my head.  So seemingly simple.

I have been looking to God for justice.  I have not looked to him for comfort. 

In Martha's transformation from a woman who is doing too much, too fast and expecting everyone around her to do the same level of work, she is rebuked by Jesus.  She looks at her sister sitting at the feet of the Saviour and feels as if she is doing all the work herself.  She sees a houseful of guests and lots to be done and she realizes she is the only one DOING.  Mary is sitting at the feet of Jesus in the living room, doing NOTHING!  She reaches out the Messiah for justice...  He lovingly slaps her hand.  He tells her to sit down, stop worrying and stop trying to make her sister something she is not...  Later we see Martha again.  She is not the same woman.  Again, Jesus is coming over... There is much to be done.  She has a houseful of guests once more...  She is grieving over the loss of her brother, Lazarus.  She could be bitter - "Oh, here HE comes again...  More work and less help, once more..." But that is not her response.  Instead of Mary, Martha is the first one out the door to meet Him, leaving her guests to fend for themselves for a moment.  And this time, she seeks the comfort she knows He will give her...  (Insert Ah-Ha moment here.)  She isn't seeking justice, she isn't there to yell because He is late - She simply wants her Friend to comfort her.

I have missed that lesson... Until now.

A companion to fill the void

For those of you who were with me when I lost my Jewel, it was a very tough time around here.  There are still nights that Boy has very sad feelings over her loss.  There are actually still times that I look for Jewel.  I see border collies around the ranch and do double takes.  She was really an incredible dog friend.

It has been almost 3 months and we are healing rather nicely.  Especially since Pogo has slipped into our routine like he was meant to be here.  (And after finding out that his birthday is the same day as mine, he was absolutely meant to be here!)

Pogo loves ranch life and is seldom out of sight for long.  He loves his housemate, Kitty the wonder dog (a Pembroke Welsh Corgi), and is certain that given enough time she will devote herself to him as he has to her...  Kitty, not so much! She thinks Pogo is just too much of a girlie-man for her...  Snotty, but true.

Pogo, when in the house, and not galavanting around the ranch like the rest of the pack, spends alot of time looking more like a cat.  He rests on the back of the couch or nested nicely in the comforter on my bed.  He is spoiled that way and makes me smile from my heart when I see him!

He is a Mr. Barkerson...  Barks at just about every loud noise.  We are a loud family and this can get a bit much.  Does it change the fact that we are all just over-the-top-in-love with him (well, Husband may disagree with that statement...)?  Not really.  He does tricks for his treats and is generally well behaved.  He simply "talks"... ALOT.  You can see it in his face... "HEY!  Someone is here!  Did you hear that?  I want to go see, let's go see together!  Why aren't you moving?  Don't you hear that?  They are here!  Let's see who the "they" are!"  He wants us to go check it out... He is completely baffled when we don't.

And personality?  OMGoodness!  This dog is loaded with it!  He harumphs when he doesn't get his way, he sniffs-sneezes when he wants something, and he runs around like a crazy man when he is excited.  He can "go get (his) bunny" on command and chews it around until he finds the squeeky part to squeek, squeek, squeek.  This is the toy he picked out of the bin at the store all by himself.  He LOVES his bunny!  And even though he has torn the top of Bun open, he is very careful not to destroy the squeeker.  He will play ball and loudly bark out his delight as he careens down the hallway to fetch it back to you.  Bun, however, is not for fetch, Bun is for keep-away!  That is another fun and delightful game....

I have gone on long enough about another zoo member... I hope I haven't bored you to death.  But I thought you all might like to know that though Jewel's passing was hard on us, it was eased by Pogo's coming in.  We are in respite from tragedy and hope to live out our days with dogs friends like these.

Letters from my day...

To the Lunch Counter Worker at the Ford Dealership:
Everyone is having a bad economic year.  Yes, everyone.  Especially those persons who have ventured out to have their own business.  Trust me, I know... I have three.  No one is interested in how you are going to start charging for random cuttlery, ketsup packets, napkins etc. if someone forgets to get them from the local eatery they choose instead of your dreary counter.  No one cares that it pisses you off. No one.  I am also not intimidated by you, since I did not need any of your paltry supplies to eat my lunch.  And since I cannot eat anything you provide, kindly stuff your dirty looks at my Taco Bell bag in your ear!  Maybe if you changed your attitude and quitcherbitchin, your counter would be fuller and so would your pockets!

To the Ford Service Customer Rep:
Yes, I have boobs.  Yes, I am a fairly attractive woman.  No, this does not mean that I am an idiot.  I do not appreciate the lies you tell  me to try to talk me into cleaning my battery terminals for $35!  It was a rip off charge last month when you tried to get me to do it and it is still a rip off now.  My husband cleaned off the "extremely" corroded terminals in all of 5 minutes with very little effort.  The next time you lie to me about how bad things are, make sure I cannot check up on you and that you don't involve my husband.  It flat pisses him off.

To the Person Who Insisted on Driving below the speed limit on the Freeway:
I am the last person to tell you to speed.  I cannot speed myself, as I get caught on a regular basis when I do.  But if you do not want to at least drive the speed limit, kindly move your tortoise-impersonating-arse out of the way so the rest of us can at least motor along and get where we need to in some semblance of timeliness.  It makes those nut-jobs who tend towards road rage endanger those of us who simply want to travel safely up and down the by-ways of our state.  Move it!

To Husband:
I am so appreciative of all you do in a day.  I am happy to kiss you good night and wish you luck as you traipse off to play free poker in order to recharge your batteries.  Simply know that I will call in the same favor in the not-too-distant future and I will expect the same shining attitude from you.   :P

An attitude of gratitude...

Despite the fact that Blogger seems to be all farged up today, monkeying with my beautiful picture and not allowing me to type in the left alignment, I am going to choose to ignore that.  I am going to choose to be grateful that I can blog.  I am going to be grateful that despite the fact that this really bites, I still have a beautiful thank you card to send out to those who were so wonderful as to gift us something this year at Christmas.  I choose that.  I choose that instead of ranting and being disappointed that Blogger seems to suck more and more and I am seriously considering checking out that WordPress thingy...

Ahem.  On to my regular post...

Gratitude.  It seems alusive these days.  In this time where there are many who feel the world owes them a living, that I owe them courtesy despite their rudeness, that life owes them fairness...  In this time, gratitude seems to be slipping farther and farther away from us.  I want to make some changes in my life that at least make a feable attempt at stemming that tide.  I want to be grateful.  I want to look at my life and remember that I am owed nothing.  No one has to be nice to me.  Life is not fair.  But I can choose the be grateful in the midst of it.  I can choose to be joyful.  Not gleeful - don't think anyone would buy that from me!  But at peace with my circumstances and accepting of my daily station.  That I can choose to do.

I have begun the daunting task of preparing meals to be eaten at the kitchen table once more.  We did this for the first years of our kids' lives to teach them table manners and to give them time with Daddy.  We need it again as we start into the teen years.  My children are very good kids.  They are not surly or separatist, like I was at their ages.  Give them time, I am sure some changes will take place.  Right now, however, they are good and kind and people I want to spend time with.  More than scarfing down dinner in front of the television.  More than glancing hugs and 5 minutes at bed time, during prayer.  I want to know my kids and know where their hearts are during this tumultuous time.  And I am grateful for the opportunity.  I can throw together meals and set the table for that.

Gratitude.  What are you grateful for today?  Write it down.  Look at it.  Will it be something you can share?  Is it important?  Will it fade in the next 5 minutes?  Can, and more importantly, will you hold onto that gratitude and make it last?  I'll try if you will... :-)

My Husband is the Bomb!

In the land of men, my husband rocks!  Just got home from the Dodge Invitational Freestyle Reining (that's where they ride horses to music and they slide and spin) where Man of Mine took the grand prize!!!!!  SaWeet!  He so rocks!

The horse he rode is incredible, the owner is a doll and a wonderful client and I am just so incredibly blessed!  He rode to the song, "In Color," by Jamey Johnson and rode Houston Shine.  He has been blessed to be able to ride this particular horse all year and do very well on him.  As a bonus, the owner (Hi Sheryl!) also rode to great accomplishment this year and last year.  This horse is such an incredible individual!  What a good night!

And my Man comes home tonight!  Wahoooooo!  I will no longer be a show-widow!  Yessss!

Have a wonderful night... Just thought I would brag a little.  Ok! ALOT!

Taking one for the team...

Yup.  I did it.  Took Boy to see Avatar.  I don't know what I watched more, the movie or my son's face in utter awe!  I loved that he loved it.  He was a bit teary after.  Not because of the plot... Even he knew that was weak.  But because it was so hyped and he was so, well - spent, afterwards.  He wanted more.  Like those of us that finish a great book and want more... He wanted to go back and do more....  I can so relate, little man!  I took him because I knew that the others in the fam would not be as appreciative of the time it would take to watch this one.  2 hours and 40 minutes is epic in any man's eyes.  It's a darned good thing that the graphics are astounding and the eye candy abounds!  It is a simple movie, light on plot and very predictable. I went knowing this.  I also went hoping to be amazed at the sights and I was not disappointed.  It was mildly entertaining and I even got over my vow to never have to watch Sigourney Weaver stomp across another contrived role on the big screen.  It was for Boy, after all.  I was again rewarded with a big hug this morning and another thank you!  All worth it!  I'm a star!

A list for them... Reminders for me.

To my wonderful children,

If I can impart but a few things to you as you travel through this time onto your adulthood I will be forever grateful.  I hope that someday I have the courage to share these things with you, despite eyerolling and huffing.

• Find out who you are and remember to be just that.  Striving to please others by changing yourself only ends in disappointment for both parties.  Be you.  You are incredible, witty, intelligent, caring, compassionate and strong.  Others should be so lucky!
• Take your family with a grain of salt.  We may be your parents, but I have told you many times, we are not infallible.  We make mistakes.  We make the same mistakes you do, often, just in bigger bodies and with bigger consequences.  Know that in our desperation to see you succeed or stay healthy, we may say and do things that are neither kind or appropriate.  We love you.  Don't hold it against us.
• Laugh as often as you can.  Laugh at yourself, especially.  Taking life too seriously will lead to ulcers and crankiness and a loss of friendships.  Marry someone who can make you laugh and someone you can be silly with.  It goes a long way in a marriage!
• Follow your dreams to the end.  Pray about what your dreams are and ask God to show you how to fulfill them.  Keeping God in the dream will assure you that it is appropriate. Approach your dreams with creativity and ingenuity.  "The person with big dreams is more powerful than one with all the facts."  You just never know how God will fulfill them if you let Him.
• Make time for just you.  Play at things that entertain you, even if you do them alone.  Time alone helps you to grow who you are, to explore what feeds you and makes you happy.  Only when you are happy in yourself can you be happy with someone else.
• Don't be afraid to be alone.  Being alone isn't bad, being lonely is.  The only person you can not live without is Jesus.  All the others are icing on the cake and a blessing to cherish, but don't choose to be with someone because you are afraid of aloneness.
• Have at least one pet if possible.  Whether it is reptilian, feline, canine or rodent, having a pet keeps you accountable and responsible.  They can be a great excuse to leave a situation and a preparation for caring for others around you.
• Call your mother.  I know you will be grown up someday and chafe at the thought of calling me to let me know you are okay.  Do it anyway.  I will appreciate it greatly and I will try to be pleasant.  When I am not, please forgive me.  I will eventually come around and I will be better.
• Find the good in each day, no matter how challenging it is.  God does really work everything together for good for those that love and follow Him.  You may not see it now, you may not see it soon, but He does.  Lay your head down at night, thanking Him for the day and it's challenges.

Humming and other comforting habits of mine...

Some days just hum along don't they?  Some days are just easy and focused, gliding along the track like a well oiled machine or one of those intricate marble tracks that have the metal and the teeter-totters and they seem to go on effortlessly. 

Some days are meant to bolster us up for those other kind of days.  Days we won't mention here.  Days we argue with people close to us.  Days we end up on the bathroom floor in a little ball.  Days we really wish we could just erase and start over... Mulligan!  O, if we could shout that and do it over again!

Ain't he just the cutest? Looks like my back yard right now! Brrrr!

Today was a good day.  (My mojo is still galavanting about the universe somewhere, undoubtably drinking too much and eating whatever it wants, flirting unabashedly and wearing its skinny jeans...)  But I was whole and productive today, despite unexpected guests in the barn that came and went, leaving behind only an unexpected reparation that still has me smiling.  Today was lovely, despite the fact that it barely got into the single digits as the high temperature.  Today I felt like what I did mattered, and that just ROCKED!

I was super productive in the office, ticking things off my to-do list and getting it DONE.  I didn't take lunch until about 3pm, but that was even kind of cool since, when I returned to the house to eat quickly before the kids' bus arrived, I found my new floor scrubber on the front porch.  All the free solutions were, of course, frozen solid, but I didn't care!  I got it out of the box, put it together and happily scrubbed my floors!  It was the most fun I have had cleaning since...  Well, ever!  I even tried the grout brush... The little hand held one works great - The ones on the big machine? Eh...   But the regular floor brushes are spot on!  Or is it spot off?  Thanks to my mother who recommended I give it a try.

One can only hope that the FLOW will continue to bouy me until my precious Mojo returns her ragged, red-head back to her own droopy body.

The Loss of One's Very Important Mojo

That's right, I said it right out loud.  Ever feel that way?  Like a hack, a wannabe?  Like suddenly the door will resound with pounding and standing there on your front stoop will be a dude who is shaking his head, telling you, "Don't know how you fooled them for this long, but pack your crap!  It's time to go!"

I have been feeling this way for far too long.  I must resume the quest for my very important mojo....  I lost it somewhere between the Bucket List and Christmas.  Must have fallen between the seats, although I have turned my round rump upside down, grunting and clawing blindly in the dark to absolutely no avail whatsoever.  My mojo is missing.

If you would help me find it I would be so very grateful.  It is unassuming, yet alarming.  It is small but can fill a room full with very little effort.  It is loud and boisterous and the absolute life of the party and I cannot seem to locate it anywhere! It is very important that I find it soon.  It cannot live without me, after all it is mine and I am its...  Ahem...  I think it is hiding from me on purpose!

And Last, but definitely not Least...

Image by Getty Images via Daylife

There are certain things about me that are undeniable.  Things that I sometimes cringe about, things I am proud of, things that I would rather no one know.  But this thing... This is something that I am fairly open about.

I try (sometimes failing miserably) to open my day up each morning with at least 5 minutes of quiet reflection from my Bible.  Sometimes I fail.  Sometimes it is days and even weeks without cracking open my Bible's cover.  Those tend to be very bad days and weeks.  My Bible keeps me centered.  It keeps me in the Flow, if you will.

I am not perfect.  Never plan to be or want to be.  I leave that little tidbit up to the big J.  I am simply a Christ follower who follows and sometimes wanders and certainly fails - alot.  I love that being a Christian doesn't mean I have to be perfect.  I just have to know that all the mistakes I make and the rotten choices I choose are forgiven.  That is why I couldn't live for very long without my Bible.

I love this book that is filled to the brim with some of the most colorful, "sinful" and broken characters ever known!  I love that I fit in these pages with all those corrupt and sometimes well-meaning folks.  I don't hope to ever understand all the stories and concepts in these pages.  I just hope to always be allowed to open it's binding and glean from it what I will. I cannot live without my Bible.

*********************************************************************

There... That seals it.  Those are the things that I cannot live without.  Some of them are whimsical.  Some direly serious.  Some from the very pit of my heart...  Have a wonderful day!

A very cute and wonderful idea... A new way to list?

And idea I pirated from McG, who was inspired by someone else...  Please forgive...  It's late and I'm beat!

I cannot live without my computer... REALLY! I would die!

Image via Wikipedia

My computer is alot of things to me.  It is a friendly face (depending on what I put on the front screen...) in the morning, waiting to open up onto worlds that entertain, educate and interest me.  It asks very little of me, with the exception of some minor clean up every now and then and an occasional wipe down from grubby fingers.

I have a purple computer.  (Did you doubt that would be true?)  I am a PC, not a Mac.  I am a Dell, not an HP.  I am Windows not Linux.  I use my computer as a social tool (not Facebook or MySpace but Blogger and Twitter), I use it to work, to play and to communicate.  I have always loved computers and the worlds they open up to us rural folks, as a whole.  I am very much unlike my husband who is absolutely NOT a technophile.  (Yes, he still chants, "Rotary phones and typewriters...  Why can't we all go back to rotary phones and typewriters???")  I love the feel of the clicky keys on my full size keyboard at the barn computer, I lament the cramped keyboard on the feed store computer and I relish the smoothness and adeptness with which my laptop (the purple one) sends letters forming words onto my screen.

I have gone without a computer for very short stints.  It makes me crazy.  Not actually insane, but fairly certain that I am missing something important.  I hate that.  When a recent acquaintance made the off hand remark that laptops would soon be obsolete and give way to the ever increasing smart phones, I blanched just a little.  I love my smart phone - Don't get me wrong.  But there is something about my computer that is just so comforting.  I like being able to see everything on the screen at once.  (Maybe that is in part due to the fact that my eyes are rebelling against me and I have to wear the biggie glasses more and more...)  I like the sound of the keys clicking along as I type in the early morning hours.  I like the glow of the screen on my face....  I just plain, like my computers.

For a myriad of reasons, I would fail to exist if I didn't have my computer!

Yup... It's definitely the flow...

My New Years day was perfect.  Nothing special. Just perfect. I spent it hanging out with the kids, playing Wii (yes, I'm sore), taking a bath, playing with my phone (still in Droid-Induced-Heaven), and reading a very good book by Francine Rivers.  Hubby was in and then back out again, running to his show up the hill in Denver. He is dreadfully sick, but I loaded him down with meds and oils and we are hoping for the best... Pogo got a bath and a little bit of a hair cut (don't ask). He smells much better when we cuddle now.  Like I said, perfect.

Yesterday was a close second as I got some time with a friend that has been incredibly busy.  She is studying for her Masters and the nut decided to take two classes on top of a very full work schedule.  One of the few times I did not admire her endeavor! Made my life look sane and orderly...  Ha ha!

Hubby made it home last night for a day.  He will be working, but that is fine.  I am happy to have had a good night's sleep with his weight in bed beside me.  It makes for deep sleep and less bumps I hear in the night. Bliss.

I have a few things planned for my day that are work related, but mostly I am planning on spending it with Boy.  Girl is with a friend, so Boy and I will  be able to shop together...  I look forward to it.  He gets little time alone with Mom...  Since we are so similar, I enjoy him immensly. (Man, I miss the spell check...  Damned Google!) We giggle, we laugh, he rolls his eyes at me, I sing silly songs and make up Transformer names that could be me in disguise.  It is a good day I have planned.

With the crack of Monday coming, I look forward to blogging about my last "Things I Cannot Live Without."  See you then!

Happy ... new...y...

Image via Wikipedia

Yeah, um...  That was the sound of me falling asleep at 10:30 last night after crying uncontrollably and rediculously over nothing much at all.  So much for "Flow"... Eh!  I don't count it as official, since it was not technically the New Year yet...  So today begins my year of Flow...  Hopefully not Flop...   But I digress! This is the post that spawns a thousand new posts for the year (ok - that is clearly an exaggeration since that would mean more than two posts a day, which is definitely not in my time adgenda...  Again, digression...) Can you tell that I have had two cups of coffee?  And am working on my third???? 

Today?  Well, today I will slather myself in some essential oils to boost my mood, make something yummy for eating, and hopefully simply enjoy my children today.  We have no real plans, as we had no real plans last night.  Hubby was home for the evening, but was woefully sick. (He also revealed a heck of a shiner this morning, aparently aquired while setting up the stalls at his latest horse show.)  He too will return to work today and then leave about lunch time to go back to the show for overnight and maybe two...  We shall see what that brings us.  I, however, will not wait.  Maybe, Boy and Girl and I will see a flick.  Maybe we will shop.  I haven't a clue.  But I will FLOW...

I had wonderous plans to spend my Christmas money on a better point and shoot camera - One with a higher pixel rate than my current 3.0.  Maybe one with a fancy N-type logo on it...  But after much perusal and some soul searching, I have discovered, really what I need to get is a new floor scrubber.  Blech.  Not very romantic or very creative, but since I am coming to the end of my contract with my house cleaner (Hey, Jodes!), I have decided I want to remain organized and fairly tidy and that means saving some time.  Plus, I hate using dirty mop water to mop the floor. Double-Blech!  So, going all "flow-y", a floor scrubber it is!

I will finish my "Things I Can't Live Without" posts and then ruminate on what other project I would love to do, bloggy-wise.  I have made some wonderful friends here and I miss you all when I am absent.  So I am "flowing" there too!

I hope your New Year's Day is wonderful, filled with activity or non-activity as the case may be.  I congratulate those that began their New Year with a fiance, those that got back together over the Holiday, and those that blissfully remained united as the Holiday rang in.  My hope for 2010 remains.  I wish simply to Flow!

God Bless!